I need something for a wedding

[The Collector]

I'm looking for something to read at my daughter's wedding in a month's time. At the moment she has suggested something from the speech of Aristophanes from Plato's Symposium. It's a while since I read the book and having had a quick look through I can't see that it is going to be a particular crowd pleaser. I also know her motives and don't want to play to her tune if i am truthful. I think that I would like something from someone's letters, real or imaginary . I've been looking through Aphra Behn's "Love letters between a Nobleman and his Sister" but its a big book and I need to make a decision (so I am informed) by Tuesday next week. Does anyone have any suggestions of something suitable?

 

I think suitable , according to my daughter, will be slightly obscure with a good hint of riskiness whilst on the face of it making a sweet staement about the power of love and all that good stuff. ( I wouldn't know myself. I've only been married 32 years and we only have nine children.)

 

I would like to get something from Aphra behn if anyone has any experience....

[Claire]

Wow - that's a pretty specific set of requirements! The last wedding I went to had a reading from Pam Ayres - which probably fails on all counts.

 

As well as the Pam Ayres suggestion, there are a couple of meatier ideas on the Wedding Poetry Thread - no Aphra Benn, though, I'm afraid - and no letters, but a little older and more obscure than Pam, at least. My next wedding (also in a month) are having John Donne, "The Good Morrow"

 

Once you decide, I'd love to know what you come up with. I hope there are others on the forum more helpful than I am!

[lunababymoonchild]

Well, I have no idea how obscure this would be considered but how about Robert Burns My Love is Like a Red Red Rose?

 

ETA Not obscure at all but how about Sonnets from the Portuguese, XLII (How do I love thee?)?

[The Collector]

Well, I have no idea how obscure this would be considered but how about Robert Burns My Love is Like a Red Red Rose?

 

ETA Not obscure at all but how about Sonnets from the Portuguese, XLII (How do I love thee?)?

 

Looked at Rab Burns and yes I like that poem but I could do the Dumfries accent and I think that my daughter wants something with a bit of cynicism in it as well. I have half a mind to read it and something else - to be decided.

 

Afraid you lost me on the second comment ,ETA?

[Claire]

On many internet forums, ETA = 'Edited To Add', when someone has posted something, then gone back and amended it.

[Hazel]

I would like to get something from Aphra behn if anyone has any experience....

I've only read The Rover but I don't remember anything suitable. What about something from Shakespeare, not the sonnets, but if your daughter wants cynicism try something on love from Measure for Measure or MacBeth(!). A bit of Philip Larkin might be quite funny.

 

A quick Google on anti-love poetry brings up Pam Wagner's poem:

 

 

 

Love is, if only, a word

twisted, double-tongued,

bladed to cut more than it cleaves,

an avowal of falsity and pomp,

of circumstance always changing,

like lies, rotting fruit,

an overblown cabbage rose.

</pre>

[lunababymoonchild]

Afraid you lost me on the second comment ,ETA?

On many internet forums, ETA = 'Edited To Add', when someone has posted something, then gone back and amended it.

Exactly what happened.

 

Never heard of Aphra Behn so can't help you there, I'm afraid.

[bobblington]

I always like Carol Ann Duffy's Valentine

 

 

Not a red rose or a satin heart.

 

I give you an onion.

It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.

It promises light

like the careful undressing of love.

 

Here.

It will blind you with tears

like a lover.

It will make your reflection

a wobbling photo of grief.

 

I am trying to be truthful.

 

Not a cute card or a kissogram.

 

I give you an onion.

Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips,

possessive and faithful

as we are,

for as long as we are.

 

Take it.

Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,

if you like.

 

Lethal.

Its scent will cling to your fingers,

cling to your knife.

[Tay]

Or something slightly saucy?

 

Cried Strephon, panting in Cosmelia's arms,

'I die, bright nymph, I die amidst your charms!'

'Cheer up, dear youth,' replied the maid,

Dissolved in amorous pain,

'All men must die, bright boy, you know,

E'er they can rise again.'

 

Published in A Collection of Epigrams, 1727

[The Collector]

Or something slightly saucy?

 

Cried Strephon, panting in Cosmelia's arms,

'I die, bright nymph, I die amidst your charms!'

'Cheer up, dear youth,' replied the maid,

Dissolved in amorous pain,

'All men must die, bright boy, you know,

E'er they can rise again.'

 

Published in A Collection of Epigrams, 1727

 

like this... will have a closer look later tonight... last night dipped into Chaucer and found nothing suitable but really enjoyed jumping around Canterbury Tales - fits of laughter until the early hours....

[The Collector]

I've only read The Rover but I don't remember anything suitable. What about something from Shakespeare, not the sonnets, but if your daughter wants cynicism try something on love from Measure for Measure or MacBeth(!). A bit of Philip Larkin might be quite funny.

 

A quick Google on anti-love poetry brings up Pam Wagner's poem:

 

 

 

 

</pre>

 

Now why didn't I think of Larkin? Perhaps I ought to read my own threads! Will line him up with others and quiz him tonight as it were...

[The Collector]

I always like Carol Ann Duffy's Valentine

 

 

Not a red rose or a satin heart.

 

I give you an onion.

It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.

It promises light

like the careful undressing of love.....

 

 

 

You know I have never read any Carol Ann Duffy and Rebecca (daughter) was reading her fairly recently. Could be pertinent. Will look at thanks.

[David]

You can find a number of suggestions from the links on this page.

[Minxminnie]

Hmm, Valentine. I teach it and the kids always think there's something a bit sinister about the speaker. (It's great to teach, because they can have their own angle on it.)

[The Collector]

OK following all those recommendations I've come down on the following ( for now at least but the jury is still out):-

 

Christopher Marlowe's Come live with me and be my Love and C Day Lewis's own version. I stopped off at John Donne's version of the same title but felt that it wasn't as good as some of his other work - but I'm looking at him too now. Aphra Behn didn't have a suitable text for me - lovely work though (Love Letters...)

 

Then problem is that I really didn't want (a) poem (s) ? Don't ask me why.

 

Will post my final when have chosen.

[The Collector]

like this... will have a closer look later tonight... last night dipped into Chaucer and found nothing suitable but really enjoyed jumping around Canterbury Tales - fits of laughter until the early hours....

 

I really like this and I know that Rebecca would but she already has someone reading the Owl and the Pussy Cat and if her dad comes along with something like this, it's going to make the other side of the family wonder what we are all about. OK so I have 9 kids, but it's a good number .....

[hannibalheyes]

How about a bit of Shakespeare - Sonnet 130. although this is more from the male perspective.

 

My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;

 

Coral is far more red than her lips' red;

 

If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;

 

If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.

 

 

I have seen roses damask'd, red and white,

 

But no such roses see I in her cheeks;

 

And in some perfumes is there more delight

 

Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.

 

I love to hear her speak, yet well I know

 

That music hath a far more pleasing sound;

 

I grant I never saw a goddess go;

 

My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground.

 

And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare

 

As any she belied with false compare.

[megustaleer]

There's this, by C.S.Lewis, although the reference to God might be an issue - could it be edited, perhaps?

What we call “being in love” is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us … It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last; principles can last; habits can last, but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called “being in love” usually does not last. If the old fairy-tale ending “They lived happily ever after” is taken to mean “They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,” then it says what probably never was nor ever could be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be “in love” need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense—love as distinct from “being in love” is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit, reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both parties ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other, as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be “in love” with someone else. “Being in love” first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.

(C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity)

Or this very short quote


“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless–it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”

(C.S. Lewis (Four Loves)