Jassie Posted February 2, 2005 Report Share Posted February 2, 2005 You do get the car of your dreams but unfortunately an obsessive Nicholas Cage fan commits a re-enactment crime from their favourite film and just after you've parked the car and patted it lovingly it's... 'Gone in 60 Seconds'. I wish for some red dancing shoes. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tess Posted February 2, 2005 Report Share Posted February 2, 2005 You get your red dancing shoes and wear them out straight away but a car drives through a great puddle, soaking your shoes and causing the dye to rub off onto your feet. I wish I could juggle Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Claire Posted February 2, 2005 Report Share Posted February 2, 2005 You can juggle - Hurrah!! But only with live crabs. And the crabs are rather cross about this, and start nipping your fingers off with their pincers.... I'll just pop them in a little box on the mantelpiece next to my toes, shall I? - just to be tidy.... I really, really wish I belonged to a book group. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rootytootytoo Posted February 3, 2005 Report Share Posted February 3, 2005 You do belong to a book group. They keep you as a pet and feed you twiglets on the first Thursday of every month. I wish I could speak fluent Italian Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tess Posted February 3, 2005 Report Share Posted February 3, 2005 You can now speak Italiano! However you can can no longer speak English... I wish I could drive Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jassie Posted February 3, 2005 Report Share Posted February 3, 2005 You can, you drive everyone around you crazy. I wish for a knight in shining armour to take me away from all this washing up and drudgery....sigh. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rootytootytoo Posted February 4, 2005 Report Share Posted February 4, 2005 Clip clop clip clop... the Knight arrives to whisk you off your feet but unfortunately the suds from your washing up rust his armour. He grinds to a clanking halt unable to move. I wish I had a fantastic singing voice. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tess Posted February 7, 2005 Report Share Posted February 7, 2005 You have but its of a pitch only audible to dogs, woof! I wish it was lunchtime Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jassie Posted February 7, 2005 Report Share Posted February 7, 2005 It's not only lunchtime its teatime.. you plonk yourself uninvited down at the long table occupied only by the Mad Hatter, the March Hare and a very sleepy Doormouse. You are driven mad by their inane and circular conversation. I wish I was a Can-Can dancer... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tess Posted February 8, 2005 Report Share Posted February 8, 2005 ta-da! You are a can-can dancer but on opening night you forget to do your warm up and tear a ligament, leaving you on crutches for 6 months! I wish I owned a vineyard Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rootytootytoo Posted February 9, 2005 Report Share Posted February 9, 2005 Your vineyard in Chernobyl looks very pretty... although the grape size is a bit alarming and you're sure one of them just winked at you. Better jusht haff another glash of (hic)... snore. I wish I could resist corrupting other people's wishes! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Abbynormal92243 Posted February 12, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 12, 2005 You do resist corrupting others' wishes....because you're in a coma. I wish I didn't have to walk home from work today. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slowreader Posted February 13, 2005 Report Share Posted February 13, 2005 you don't have to walk home from work today because you were made redundant yesterday I wish I could score Aston Villa's winning goal in the Champions League final Quote Link to post Share on other sites
happyfriday Posted February 14, 2005 Report Share Posted February 14, 2005 You do score the winning goal but sadly you don't do so well in the Premiership and are relegated to the first division, then the second, then the third, never to enter the Premiership ever, ever again!! And never qualifying for Champions league again!!!! (Well after been knocked out of the first round the year after you won that is!!! ) I wish I'd won the lotto on Saturday night!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Harriet Posted February 15, 2005 Report Share Posted February 15, 2005 You did win, but so did about 1000 other people and you end up winning 3p. I wish I could go on holiday tomorrow to a far off place with lots of sunshine and nice food and nice warm sea and lots of pretty little fish in the sea to look at. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Deinonychus Posted February 15, 2005 Report Share Posted February 15, 2005 You did, but the far-off holiday destination is the deserted island where your Easyjet crash-landed, the pretty little fish are piranhas and the nice food is you... I wish I could remember her name... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Seraphina Posted February 15, 2005 Report Share Posted February 15, 2005 You can remember her name, it's Frederica - but during the day she works on a building site and answers to the name Big Fred. I wish I had a cute cuddly little kitten all of my own. I'd put it in a dress and wheel it round in a pram. Don't kill it please! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nonfictionreader Posted February 15, 2005 Report Share Posted February 15, 2005 Remember the word 'little' is relative. Yes, your 'kitten' could be described as little, but only in comparison to a fully grown adult of the same species. Your junior sabre-toothed tiger demonstrates a surprising degree of resourcefulness by using his naturally impressive dental capabilities to pick the lock you have used to secure him into his 'pram'. He leaps out and, humiliated by the impractical and downright girly attire you have adorned him with, he gobbles you up whole. I wish I had a nice big chateau in the south of France, with a full compliment of household staff dedicated to my every need, comprised entirely of charming, literate and delightfully entertaining penguins. ---------------------------------------------- "Feche la vache!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tess Posted February 16, 2005 Report Share Posted February 16, 2005 The penguins are indeed charming and literate, so much so that they find you a complete bore and their job of waiting on you most degrading. So one day a rather cunning penguin called Napoleon leads his comrades into a revolt against the human world, whilst napping on your veranda you are tied to your chair and thrown out to sea. I wish I lived in a lighthouse Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Opal Posted February 16, 2005 Report Share Posted February 16, 2005 You do. But sadly you are stuck there until your Prince Charming comes to rescue you. He tries, but can't pick the lock to get into the lighthouse and decides to find another damsel in distress to rescue, so you're stranded there with only a few penguins from Nonfictionreader's wish for company. The penguins get bored of you after a few weeks and chuck you in the sea too. I wish I had a chocolate fountain. (Like the one on the Vicar of Dibley Christmas special) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Deinonychus Posted February 17, 2005 Report Share Posted February 17, 2005 You wish is granted - but unfortunately, in order to have such a device, your entire water supply has been cut off and replaced with second-rate cooking chocolate, meaning that all washing, whether it be your clothes, dishes or even yourself must be done in said liquid. (As for the loo - well, quite literally, don't go there...) I wish my neighbours would move out... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dream Weaver Posted February 17, 2005 Report Share Posted February 17, 2005 Your neighbours do move out...and in with you. I wish that this wish would come true. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Seraphina Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 That's a rubbish wish! You don't even wish for anything! As punishment the Magic Wish Frog turns your house into a gingerbread cottage. Initially you think it's quite sweet (pun intended) but then you realise it comes complete with evil witch. Catching you off your guard, the witch pushes you into the oven and cooks you with brussells sprouts and cabbage....ewww! I wish I had John Merricks remains........all those crazy elephant bones! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Deinonychus Posted February 19, 2005 Report Share Posted February 19, 2005 And so you shall. In your own body. I wish my bills weren't so relentlessly high... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nonfictionreader Posted February 19, 2005 Report Share Posted February 19, 2005 Well, to start with, you could differentiate between your unimaginatively named children by calling one Billy, one Will and the other just plain old William. Then you could opt to practice a modicum of old-fashioned parenting by refusing to let them indulge in recreational drugs, at least 'under your roof'. It may sound harsh, but everyone will be happier in the long run. I wish every day could be pancake day........ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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