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Nonfictionreader

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  1. I think I understand your name now. It's like an alcohol-free version of a book by John Irving, isn't it?
  2. Well, to start with, you could differentiate between your unimaginatively named children by calling one Billy, one Will and the other just plain old William. Then you could opt to practice a modicum of old-fashioned parenting by refusing to let them indulge in recreational drugs, at least 'under your roof'. It may sound harsh, but everyone will be happier in the long run. I wish every day could be pancake day........
  3. Remember the word 'little' is relative. Yes, your 'kitten' could be described as little, but only in comparison to a fully grown adult of the same species. Your junior sabre-toothed tiger demonstrates a surprising degree of resourcefulness by using his naturally impressive dental capabilities to pick the lock you have used to secure him into his 'pram'. He leaps out and, humiliated by the impractical and downright girly attire you have adorned him with, he gobbles you up whole. I wish I had a nice big chateau in the south of France, with a full compliment of household staff dedicated
  4. Both you and the taxman are to be disappointed - I am not an incarnation of Carly, although I am aquainted with the young lady.
  5. Honest to g*d, I picked this sentence/passage entirely at random from the middle (p.385) of a copy of Ulysses. "Here the listener who was none other than the Scotch student, a little fume of a fellow, blond as tow, congratulated in the liveliest fashion with the young gentleman and, interrupting the narrative at a salient point, having desired his visavis with a polite beck to have the obligeness to pass him a flagon of cordial waters at the same time by a questioning poise of the head (a whole century of polite breading had not achieved so nice a gesture) to which was united an equivalent
  6. I haven't actually read The Da Vinci Code. I listened to half of it on an audiobook and found the story itself quite compelling, if more suited in spectacle and campness to treatment in a Jerry Bruckheimer movie. Why only half? Quite simple: Cardboard characters. Langdon is Indiana Jones! The French codebreaker woman is.... I don't know, she's popped up in way too many films and books for me to pinpoint her to one origin. Same for the dogged but noble policeman. If these characters were food, they'd be mashed potato without salt: There's nothing to chew on, and despite an appealing initi
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