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David

Daft Names

94 posts in this topic

Restored Thread - silly and inconsequential, but a laugh!

 

David 15th February 2006 01:48 PM

 

I was inspired to start a new thread that might be good for a few posts by the local lunchtime news. It featured an American ship in Portsmouth and interviewed Commander Chip Rock.

 

Speaks for itself.

 

Any examples of daft names you've come across in life? (Sadly, all my really good examples come from former pupils and I wouldn't post those)

 

Stewart 15th February 2006 02:14 PM

 

http://www.b3ta.com/features/realnames/

 

My Friend Jack 15th February 2006 02:20 PM

 

I remember reading an article many years ago, which gave the very good advice that, if your name is Jennifer, don't ever marry a Mr Taylor.

 

Royal Rother 15th February 2006 02:22 PM

 

:naughty:

 

Thumbsucker 15th February 2006 02:28 PM

 

I know a child first name - Tia, middle name - Maria. I also went to school with a Richard Head - what were the parents thinking?

 

Opal 15th February 2006 02:39 PM

I remember reading an article many years ago, which gave the very good advice that, if your name is Jennifer, don't ever marry a Mr Taylor.

You may joke about this but I have a friend with that name. Seriously. Her parents never realised, and I don't think it was ever mentioned til she came to uni!!

 

Seraphina 15th February 2006 02:49 PM

 

Last year I had to type a letter to a 'Diane Cockhead'.....!

 

If I were her I'd get myself married ASAP!

 

Thumbsucker 15th February 2006 02:50 PM

I remember reading an article many years ago, which gave the very good advice that, if your name is Jennifer, don't ever marry a Mr Taylor.

I'm going to be extremely thick now and put my hand up and ask someone to explain this to me. :dunce:

 

This reminds me of when I was at school and someone asked what a 69 was and I said isn't it an ice cream?! Oh to be young and innocent again.

 

Opal 15th February 2006 02:57 PM

I'm going to be extremely thick now and put my hand up and ask someone to explain this to me.

This reminds me of when I was at school and someone asked what a 69 was and I said isn't it an ice cream?! Oh to be young and innocent again.

 

My friend with this name is known as Jenny. Say it out loud. Go on.... Jenny Taylor... Get it yet? (I think this one is that weird kind of bloke humour that women only find funny for about 10 minutes but men can laugh at for hours. ;) )

 

Cathy 15th February 2006 03:00 PM

 

I love threads for people as easily amused as me! I've had to type letters to Mrs McWee, phoned a Mr Carrot who was an examiner and a Mr Love who ran a tanning salon! Tee hee hee

 

PS I'm baffled about the Taylor thing too!

 

Thumbsucker 15th February 2006 03:03 PM

My friend with this name is known as Jenny. Say it out loud. Go on.... Jenny Taylor... Get it yet? (I think this one is that weird kind of bloke humour that women only find funny for about 10 minutes but men can laugh at for hours. )

Thanks Opal. I see what you mean!

 

My boyfriend also has trouble with his name Tim Watson. It meant that they had to break convention with his e-mail address at work where it was usual to have initial - surname.

 

Then again, even Robert Browning didn't realise this was an offensive term!

 

Seraphina 15th February 2006 03:04 PM

 

The only reason i 'get' the Jennifer Taylor thing is because, spookily, I watched a film last night that had a joke about it in it. Although the girl's name was Jenna - perhaps that makes it slightly clearer!

 

Hazel 15th February 2006 03:05 PM

 

This is going to sound made up, but I promise you it is entirely true, but I used to work in an insurance office and there was this large Catholic family insured through us with the most 'exotic' names I have ever heard -

 

Immaculata Crawford

Virgil Crawford

Concepta Crawford

Maximillian Goldsmith Crawford

and

Harvey Wallbanger Crawford

 

Thumbsucker 15th February 2006 03:06 PM

The only reason i 'get' the Jennifer Taylor thing is because, spookily, I watched a film last night that had a joke about it in it. Although the girl's name was Jenna - perhaps that makes it slightly clearer!

Thank you for making me feel less of a dunce. Clearly it works a lot better with Jenna.

 

Thumbsucker 15th February 2006 03:10 PM

Harvey Wallbanger Crawford

Why would a Catholic family name a child after a cocktail?

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15th February 2006, 03:12 PM

Claire

 

Thank you for asking, Thumbsucker - I would have had to, if you hadn't!

 

I went to school with a lad called Jon-Thomas. He used to get teased something chronic about his name, and I never, never understood why, until I read Lady Chatterly's Lover!!

 

What were his parents thinking of??? (Maybe best not to answer that!)

 

What puzzles me, though, is how all the uncouth, ignorant 11 year old boys in my class knew all about this particular D H Lawrence novel!

 

#17 15th February 2006, 03:17 PM

Cathy

 

Ah. Yes, its one of those things that I can see is funny without it making me laugh.

 

There is a girl in Glasgow called Pocahontas.

 

#18 15th February 2006, 03:17 PM

Mungus

 

At my school was Mike Hunt and I can't remember anyone ever teasing him. It wasn't until I saw Porkys (or whatever film it was) that I realised! Such innocence...

 

#19 15th February 2006, 04:38 PM

Flingo

 

Quite often (especially at the end of the summer when I am doing reading challenge stats) I have come across some amusing names through libraries.

 

Some of the best recent ones were Harry and Matthew Corbett who are brothers! Poor kids!

 

There are more, but I don't feel I can post them here (breach of trust!)! The unusual ones are the worst though - the parents have tried to make a statement with their children's names, and I feel so sorry for them!

 

#20 16th February 2006, 01:33 PM

Starry

 

Well you learn something every day! My real name is Jennifer and I couldn't work out why I shouldn't marry a Mr Taylor - thanks for asking Thumbsucker!

 

In my previous job I came across a Eileen and Ben Dover (mother and son) in the records and I've recently come across a Chervaughan! I suppose Siobhan is rather difficult to spell

 

#21 16th February 2006, 02:35 PM

Tess

 

My mum works in a hospital and there have been some funny stories of names being called in the waiting room, the best was for a Mrs Mary Christmas

 

#22 16th February 2006, 02:51 PM

lucyb

This reminds me of when I was at school and someone asked what a 69 was and I said isn't it an ice cream?! Oh to be young and innocent again.

In a previous job, I had to speak to a Mrs R. Slicker and my sister's teacher was a Phillip Green. Why do parents do this? There are others but they're a little too rude for this forum - the joys of working on a helpline...

 

#23 16th February 2006, 07:10 PM

Adrian

Phillip Green

I know him. He married Teresa, didn't he?

 

#24 16th February 2006, 07:18 PM

Hilary

 

There is a Jenny Taylor in our church and as soon as dh first mentioned her name I said, 'Oh no! Poor girl, how awful!' and he said, 'Why?' and I then had to admit I had a ruder mind than him and explain!

 

There was an Ashley Hunt at my school and it took me a while to work out why people called him Mike...and then I wished I didn't know...

 

#25 16th February 2006, 07:20 PM

Thumbsucker

I've recently come across a Chervaughan! I suppose Siobhan is rather difficult to spell

This reminds me of something I read on the TES website where there was a discussion on names and some parents' difficulties with phonics. One parent, when asked for their child's name, gave the name Schlow - when asked to spell it because it was an unusual name the parent spelt out Chloe! Oh dear!

 

#26 16th February 2006, 07:39 PM

Hazel

Why would a Catholic family name a child after a cocktail?

I have absolutely no idea, but he was the only one that I found hard to speak to. I understood the origins of the others but his name just made me laugh. I suppose the family wanted memorable names and it worked because I have never forgotten them!

 

#27 16th February 2006, 11:12 PM

megustaleer

I know him. He married Teresa, didn't he?

No, she was his sister, she was a pupil at a school I once worked at!

 

#28 17th February 2006, 09:02 AM

lucyb

 

No! Once again, why don't people think a little harder about names?

 

#29 17th February 2006, 09:07 AM

Hazel

 

When I was pregnant with our first and we were thinking about names, I really like Isaac and it wasn't until my hubby pointed out that our son would be called Isaac Hay -too similar to Isaac Hayes, so we changed. I then settled on Lucas, but then my brother in law pointed out that the child would be Lucas Hay, which sounded too like Lucozade. It is impossible to get a name that no one can make fun of!

 

#30 17th February 2006, 10:17 AM

megustaleer

 

Middle names beginning with vowels can be a minefield, the initials making unforseen words. I have a friend who used to be the headmaster of a school for children with behavioural difficulties.

Because of the names his parents chose for him, he was able to initial all memos and notices 'GOD'

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#31 17th February 2006, 12:44 PM

Flingo

There was an Ashley Hunt at my school and it took me a while to work out why people called him Mike...and then I wished I didn't know...

I think I may have to ponder on that one for a bit.

 

EDIT to say - ooooooh, I get it now! I wish I didn't too...

Because of the names his parents chose for him, he was able to initial all memos and notices 'GOD'

That's quite a good one, I knew someone whose initials were 'PIG'. Poor girl!

 

#32 17th February 2006, 01:45 PM

David

 

My mother once lived in flats in which another resident was Major Pratt, and apparently it suited.

 

As far as initials go, it always seems unfortunate that the man voted as the greatest Briton of all time is WC.

 

#33 17th February 2006, 06:31 PM

megustaleer

 

Pratt was (is) the name of the educational psychologist who refused to have my dyslexic son assessed for a Statement of Special Educational Need, 20 years ago...amazing the things you remember, eh?

 

#34 17th February 2006, 10:05 PM

donnae

 

At school, there was a boy in the year above me called Wayne King.

 

Someone in our village is called Elon Gater! Hope they didn't name any of their children Alison!

 

#35 17th February 2006, 10:30 PM

belinda

 

I was at college with an American called Randy Love and I work with a guy whose surname is Badcock.

 

#36 18th February 2006, 05:57 PM

supersexy007

 

Not for the faint hearted........There is a school in the city where I live called Jack Hunt school - I'm not kidding!! What were they thinking??? Sorry!!

 

#37 18th February 2006, 06:39 PM

David

 

I knew of a school which was changing its name and considered using the name of an educational benefactor of yore - it would have been 'Sexey's School for Girls'. They decided against.

 

That didn't stop them some years later from adopting a new slogan - 'Where Girls Come First'. This was eventually dropped when it was pointed out that it could be read another way...

 

#38 19th February 2006, 10:23 AM

supersexy007

 

I once went to a race night where someone had called their horse "Norfolk and Chance" It wasn't until the poor announcer read out the odds that the penny dropped. How we laughed!!

 

#39 19th February 2006, 11:03 AM

Bill

I knew of a school which was changing its name and considered using the name of an educational benefactor of yore - it would have been 'Sexey's School for Girls'. They decided against.

I went to Sexey's Grammar School, Blackford, the sister school to Sexey's School, Bruton, both in Somerset. Named after Hugh Sexey, who I expect was the same benefactor. The hilarity palls after a while.

 

#40 19th February 2006, 11:42 AM

deirdreofthesorrows

 

my parents have friends whenever they spoke about their children (whom I had never met) they spoke about Ardean,Archeryl and Artanya which I thought were unusual names. It wasn't till many years later that I discovered that their names were actually Dean, Cheryl and Tanya and their parents were always referring to them as 'our' ....

 

I must confess that I do not 'get' some of the others that are posted on this thread, I can only assume I am terribly dense .Or hopefully that it may be down to dialect or accent

 

#41 19th February 2006, 12:21 PM

David

I must confess that I do not 'get' some of the others that are posted on this thread, I can only assume I am terribly dense .Or hopefully that it may be down to dialect or accent

It's probably more likely that you're far purer of mind!

 

#42 19th February 2006, 05:23 PM

deirdreofthesorrows

It's probably more likely that you're far purer of mind!

jeeze I wish that were true.Thankyou anyway!

 

#43 20th February 2006, 01:28 PM

Grammath

I knew of a school which was changing its name and considered using the name of an educational benefactor of yore - it would have been 'Sexey's School for Girls'. They decided against.

 

That didn't stop them some years later from adopting a new slogan - 'Where Girls Come First'. This was eventually dropped when it was pointed out that it could be read another way...

This is similar (although filthier) to the girls' school next to my secondary school, who were very insistent they were the Haberdashers' Aske's School for Girls and not the Haberdashers' Aske's Girls School (look for the acronym).

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This thread is a playground for teachers.

 

I've taught a Chevonne. My colleague's sister has a client whose son's name, Guy, is pronounced as Gooey.

Anothe colleague swears that a pupil in her class has twin baby sisters called Dolce and Gabanna. I don't know whether I should believe that one!

 

There is a legend in these parts of twin brothers who were the subject of a well publicised study on learning difficulties. They were James and Seamus. They had a younger brother - called Jamie.

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What a great thread. My kids have come across all sorts of names at school that sound weird to us but seem to be quite normal in the countries they come from. Have to go through their school books and mention some of them here. :D

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Anothe colleague swears that a pupil in her class has twin baby sisters called Dolce and Gabanna. I don't know whether I should believe that one!

 

A lady in Mothers & Toddlers recently told me that her neighbour had twin girls and called them Versace and Armani. She lives quite close to the offending neighbour and was perfectly sure that this was the case.

 

A teacher friend of mine told me that she had a girl in her class called Satchel and another called Coriander.

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I read recently an article about celebs and the weird names they give their children. Of course they touted the usual Pixie, Fifi, Peaches, Dweezil, Leaf, River, Liberty, Romeo, Cruz, Brooklyn, Tallulah Lilac, Kai, Bluebell, ...and so on but then they went onto to criticize Julia Roberts for saddling her twins with "really unusual and wacky" names. And what are those children called? Well, Phineas and Hazel, of course. Now, Phineas I can understand (though I quite like it), but Hazel? Is that an unusual name in America or something?

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"really unusual and wacky" names. And what are those children called? Well, Phineas and Hazel, of course. Now, Phineas I can understand (though I quite like it), but Hazel?

Well...y'know...*shuffles feet awkwardly*...I didn't like to draw attention to it, but....

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Any embarrassing middle names you'd like to 'fess up to Dave?

 

Anyhoo - Hazel isn't my first name...entirely...

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Anyhoo - Hazel isn't my first name...entirely...

Very enigmatic!

 

'Hazel' is, of course, an extremely elegant name, and the Americans are naturally being perverse. My favourite rabbit in all literature shares the same name, so what more need I say?

 

As for middle names, well, that would be telling, wouldn't it?

 

And maybe David isn't mine...

 

:hmm:

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I know three Hazels in RL, one roughly my age, one about 15 years older, and one the age of my younger son. I admit to thinking it was a tad oldfashioned when I was told this girl's name.

 

My Real Name was very unusual when it was given to me, and was often commented on. Then it became really common when I was in my mid twenties (and I mean common). It had its advantages, everyone thought I was much younger than my true age, but I did have to avoid mentioning that I live in Essex.

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Hazel? Is that an unusual name in America or something?
Well, maybe there are some Americans after all who like to give their children normal names? ;)

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I was reminded of this thread when I came across the little gem below on the Failblog.

 

<a href="http://failblog.org"><img src="http://failblog.wordpress.com/files/2008/12/fail-owned-mike-litoris-name-fail.jpg" alt="fail-owned-mike-litoris-name-fail" title="fail-owned-mike-litoris-name-fail" width="500" height="384" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-9806" /></a><br />more <a href="http://failblog.org">fail, owned and pwned pics and videos</a>

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I used to work on benefits and had loads of comedy names, some of them are a touch risque so I'll understnad if they get removed!:

 

Gordon Bennett

Axl Rose

John Johnny Johnson

Fanny Hair

Myfanwy Smells

Branston Pickle

 

I'm sure I'll remember more.

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One that always made me smile - far more so than if it had been the one you'd expect - was Theresa White.

I always heard that one as Theresa Green.

 

One that took me an embarassing amount of time to get was Luke Wright.

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I always heard that one as Theresa Green.
I think that is the point

 

One that took me an embarassing amount of time to get was Luke Wright.
It's missed me :thinking:

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I went to school with a Theresa Green ...

 

My sister went to school with a Martin Martin. How unimaginative were those parents?

 

And what about the BBC newsreporters, Fenella Fudge, which I always hear as Vanilla Fudge, and Julia Caesar?

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Think Green Cross Code. Luke Wright, Luke Left, etc.

 

I had a boyfriend from Manchester once, he would probably have got it :rolleyes:

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There was an Azura Skye named in the credits of an awful film I watched with my son yesterday. Maybe she had a sensible name, but didn't want it associated with the film.

 

I've known some people with interesting names but it would seem weird to post them here - I mean, they still have these names. Don't you think this thread would be a strange place to end up if you googled yourself?

 

:yikes:

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On a helpline long, long ago I had to talk to a Mrs R Slicker.

 

I'm with Minxminnie on the lack of imagination of so many parents. Why else would you call your child Peter Peters or William Williams? Owen Owens, John Johns, Robert Roberts... the list is endless - is it a stunning lack of thought or just indifference?

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Some favourites:

 

American racing driver, Dick Trickle. Or how about the actor, Rodger Bumpass? Or Fox News reporter, Eric Shawn?

 

My personal favourites are Dong Suk Yuk, on Facebook. Another, coming as a bit of double whammy due to her profession as a gynaecologist, is Dr Lisa Minge. There's also Wan Kin Too from class of '64 over in Hong Kong.

 

My memorised list of funny names was proud to welcome a new addition about a year back. While I know I shouldn't laugh at this victim of a hit and run, I couldn't help it. Say hello to Kok On Chin.

 

This guy, from the Department of Biological Chemistry and Molecular Pharmacology at Harvard Medical School, is called Welcome Bender.

 

Even funnier would be if Dr Andre Tits had a daughter called Ophelia.

 

And there used to be a Willy Hunter at my school. :D

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